Parent Gossip

As I said in my last post, Witchling 12 is off to Secondary School this week.  She’s worried, and excited and Tobes and I are nervous wrecks!  Here is our guide to helping your child make a smooth (or as smooth as possible) transition into secondary school.

•    Expect insecurity and everything that goes with it.  Don’t be surprised or cross if your child displays behaviour that is out of charater in the run up to the big day and for the first weeks. Regression and ‘childish’ behaviour is not uncommon, including tantrums and tearfulness. Phantom illness is another one to watch out for.
•    Get organised.  It may be a bit late now that we are into September, but try to make sure that your child has all the right kit that they will need when they start. Uniform, PE Kit, Maths equipment, the right colour socks! If your child feels well prepared practically they will feel less daunted by their new regime.
•    Don’t let your worries show.  If you are worried or concerned about your child making such a big step, imagine how they must feel inside.  Don’t pile your own anxiety on top of theirs.
•    Be positive.  Talk in positive terms about how proud you are of them and how excited you are for them having such an adventure.
•    Be there. If, like us, you are working parents, try to have someone there to see your child off to school, even if it’s only to walk to the bus stop with them, for the first week. It’s also a good idea to meet them from school for the first few days so that they get on the right bus and get off at the right stop.
•    Make sure that your child is road smart.  If they have to cross main roads or go a long way to get to and from school independently then it is vital that they know how to do this safely.
•    All children starting a new year are going to be nervous.  If/when your child talks to you about their fears and worries, don’t dismiss them but remind them that everyone they will be starting with will be feeling the same way.
•    Make the most of any opportunities that your secondary schools offers for your child to have a look around the school before the start of term.  Lots of primary schools run programs with the secondary schools that they feed up to.  Open evenings are also a great chance for you to have a look around yourself so that your can reassure your child.
•    Check out what pastoral care is available to your child at their new school. Witchling 12’s new school has an excellent reputation for pastoral care, which is reassuring for us, as we know any problems she has will be taken seriously and dealt with accordingly.
•    Keep talking and stay interested.  Gone may be the days of staying up until 2am making a mud hut or finishing the settler’s outfit (complete with mop cap, apron and real Damper) for them, but you should still take a keen interest in what your child is doing at school.  Chat about how things are going and get to know the names of any new friends.
•    Speaking of homework…Homework at secondary school is taken a lot more seriously than at primary school. There are consequences for not handing in work on time.  Make sure that you child is aware of this and offer support where you can by making sure they have a quiet space to concentrate on their school work after school.
•    Help your child to manage their time efficiently.  Witchling 12 would love to come in and flop onto the sofa all evening.  This isn’t practical for her as she finds it hard to get motivated to complete homework after that.  Other children can only concentrate once they have had chance to wind down a bit.
•    Grown up at school, grown up at home.  I have, by my own admission, held onto my little girl for as long (perhaps too long) as possible.  It’s time to let Witchling 12 grow up.  She now has a later bedtime and is encouraged to be independent as much as possible.  She is taking turns to cook dinner (which she loves to do now) and is thrilled with her new freedom. Tying this is with the start of term has made her view the start of secondary school with more confidence.
Every child is different.  Some may take to secondary school like a duck to water while others may struggle for the first term or longer.  Whatever the case may be, make sure you talk to your child and demonstrate wherever possible that you are proud of them and supportive and are there for them if they need you.