It has taken almost 35 years to do it, but I am finally overcoming my lack of confidence in myself.

For a long time, as long as I can remember in fact, I have suffered from poor self confidence.

I would look in the mirror and hate what I saw. I would assume that I couldn’t do what the other kids were doing and that I would never be able to achieve anything.

Even as an adult, in a good job, with a beautiful family and a nice home, I still felt that I wasn’t worth a penny and that I couldn’t do anything right.

Then I watched Naked: Estate Agents. I wouldn’t ordinarily watch this sort of show, but it appeared on screen as I was flicking through looking for something worth watching while I attacked the north face of the ironing mountain.

The porgramme featured a newly wed estate agent who had lost an astonishing 4st 7lb for her recent wedding. She should have been overjoyed and brim full of confidence shouldn’t she? Over the course of the show she revealed that on her wedding day she had been unable to even look at herself in the mirror and had been very self conscious.  She Couldn’t begin to say a single positive thing about herself.

I could empathise with her greatly, as I have struggled with my self image for years and have seldom been able to use much positive language about myself.  As the show went on we found out that she has a 12 year old daughter. Another similarity, I thought. Then came the saddest thing I have seen on TV for a long time. Mother and daughter discussing mum’s lack of confidence and what she thought of herself. Her daughter clearly wanted to tell her that she was beautiful and that she should be proud of herself but was struggling herself with positive language.  Mum’s insecurities were passing on to her daughter. As the tears freely flowed, our heroic estate agent realised that her constant self berating and negativity was causing her daughter to hate herself. Her daughter told her frankly that she felt that she was ugly and did not like herself much. Mum laughed and told her not to be silly, then stopped herself. It was like the sun coming out from between clouds. She heard her own voice coming from her 12 year old child’s mouth and it stunned her.

I have a 12 year old daughter who doesn’t like herself much either. I have been listening this last few days for my voice coming from her mouth and sadly I have heard it.

So now my resolution is the same as the brave naked estate agent! I will say something positive about myself each and every day from now on. Preferably within earshot of my beautiful daughters.