Thankfully, incidents of paedophilia are still comparatively rare, but that doesn’t stop us lying awake fretting about it. Paedophiles are not strange looking men in manky raincoats, as the stereotype would have us believe.  They come from all sections of society, and can be respected members of the community in positions of high power and trust. Paedophiles will try to win parents over in order to get access to their children.  Sadly, single parents are more vulnerable to this sort of approach, but we should all excersise caution if new adult friends express too much interest in our children or want to spend more time with them than with us.

They are often drawn to careers that allow them to be in close proximity to children.  Youth groups, playschemes, schools, sports coaching etc.  This also affords them power over their targets.  They can make the child feel special, grooming them with gifts and attention.  The flip side of this is that they can use their position to make threats.  If the ‘secret relationship’ is revealed then they will lose their place on the team or will get poor marks at school.
So here is my guide to keeping your child as safe as possible from the perils of ‘Stranger Danger’
1.    Openness and Good Communication. Listen to your child and make time to talk with them on a regular basis.  They have to be assured that they can talk to you about anything.
2.    Sex Education. It may be controversial but explaining how the body works and which bits are private from an early age is vital.  Children need to know what is acceptable and appropriate as soon as possible.  Many victims of paedophiles are confused because they are told by their abuser that what they are doing is perfectly acceptable and normal.
3.    No Secrets. Make a pact with your family not to keep secrets from eachother, even if someone else has asked th

em to.  Your children need to feel that it is ok to talk to you about anything.
4.    Just say no. It sounds simple but teaching a child that it is OK to say no to an adult who scares or upsets them is tricky.  Make sure they understand that their bodies and minds belong only to them and that they have

ultimate control over what happens to them.
5.    Gently but firmly. Don’t terrify your child into having nightmares about every adult they meet.  There is a fine line between making them aware of ‘stranger danger’ and destroying confidence.  Be gentle and open about the

subject and if it is too much for your child to cope with in one go, revisit the topic at a later time, once

the first lot of information has been absorbed.
6.    Answer their

questions. Once you are discussing Stranger Danger, your child may have a lot of questions. Some o

f them may be very uncomfortable but it is important to answer them all as honestly and openly as you can to build up trust so that your child can talk to you about anything.

7.    Trust your g

ut. If your instincts are warning you that something is not right and you feel your child may be being abused TAKE ACTION.
a.    If your child is in immediate danger – call the police.
b.    Don’t be afraid to speak to your GP, Social Services or your health visitor and get advice
c.    Contact the child protection helpline, run by the NSPCC 0808 800 5000.  You will be able to express your concerns and get advice on where to turn for help.

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